My 12 minutes of sanity…

12 minutes.

It takes that long. And that little.

All you runner people will cringe. Laugh maybe. But 12 minutes is my mile number.

And I try to run it EVERY DAY.

I slip out of the house at some point. Kick the boys off Spotify. And decompress with every footstep on the pavement.

No. I can’t run a marathon. No. It’ still not easy. Yes. I sweat like a mule.

But I come back better. Refreshed. Claiming something small as mine and for me.

I’m not sure how much free time you have. I’m not sure where God has put you and what you do every day. But I can bet you get overwhelmed. And frustrated. And desperate for a break.

What if you joined up a couple 12 minute moments every day? 12 minutes in the afternoon on a run? 12 minutes in the morning with Him? 12 minutes at night with a good book?

My walk with Christ is like a 12 minute moment that I keep stacking day after day. We have a relationship that’s not hit or miss. Or on one week and off the next. It’s real. And it’s predictable.

Not because I schedule it. Not because I check off the Bible reading plan taped to the wall. Or because I scribble in my flowered journal most every day.

My relationship with Christ is based on grace. And His faithfulness to me. During 12 minute runs. Or 5 minute cry-fests.

When we fail, He doesn’t. When we quit, He doesn’t.

“Jesus’ compassion never holds us to a standard of perfection, but always holds us in His arms of grace.” (Ann Voskamp)

On 12 minute runs. In 12 minute traffic. During 12 minute meetings. God’s love will be with you today.

“The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17)

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Clinging not Cruising…

Last February it hit me. Like a tidal wave. Out of nowhere.

Two months before we’d decided not to “cruise” in 2018. To throw our arms up and embrace the ride God was calling us to.

Anxiety wasn’t part of that plan.

Step 1: Meet with the doctor
Step 2: Take better care of myself
Step 3: Embrace Jeremy’s comforting words “You do you”
Step 4: Memorize verses like Psalm 46:1-“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”
Step 5: Do hard things (especially ones that make my heart race and palms sweat)
Step 6: Believe that this doesn’t define me

It’s been almost a year. There have been bad days, good days, and great ones.

II Timothy 1:7 has been my background music for months. “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

When fear takes the joy from our days, we embrace the tiny moments as grace.

And we worship.

Hard things don’t have to stop us, friends. They can cause us to pause. To fall on our faces. And to let His strength show itself perfect.

Because He faced the hardest thing, I can face hard things. You can face hard things.

Planned. Unplanned. Let’s cling. Not cruise. And find His grace totally sufficient.

“And this is the secret: Christ lives in you. This gives you assurance of sharing his glory.” Colossians 1:27b

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When you love God (and Disney)…

I’m a minimalist. We budget. Save. Look over Dave Ramsey’s Baby Steps at least once a year.

I’m married to a “giver.” We’re committed to the Summit, Compassion, and church planters around the world.

But I’m also a Disney fan. And that’s not cheap.

So in this perfect triangle of crazy, my life joins together.

Give to the Kingdom. Save for the future. Make memories at Disney.

I’m not sure how it all happened. How it all works. But it does.

I’m often inclined toward guilt. We shouldn’t spend that. People are suffering.

Sweet gifts from God can feel like burdens while they’re actually intended to cause rejoicing.

It’s a balance we seek. Long for. Try to teach our kids.

God loves us like a Father. And Fathers give their children good things to enjoy.

What kind of God would our kids grow up knowing if we never point out the good? If we always talk about what He’s wanting from us and not giving to us? Why would anyone serve someone like that?

Please hear me in total, not pieces. The Gospel is worth sacrificing for. It’s worth moving across the world for. It’s worth, well, everything.

But I won’t let myself believe the lie that to sacrifice means never to enjoy. That it means not to embrace the grace that God has planned for us.

So friends, we’re gonna take Disney trips over here. We’re gonna be a family and laugh and eat and be thankful for God’s goodness to us.

And we’re also gonna take missions trips. And serve and love and be thankful for how God is moving around the world.

Because our hope isn’t based on our savings account. It’s not based on our budget. It’s solely based on the love of our Father, “who richly provides us with everything to enjoy.”

“As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy.” (I Timothy 6:17)

 

“Christmas Adam” (and other favorite traditions)

We have a new (non-stressful) Christmas tradition.

…CHRISTMAS ADAM…

A few years ago Caleb suggested we add a new day of celebration to our Christmas countdown.

“We celebrate Christmas Eve. What about Christmas Adam?”

And that’s how it began.

On December 23, the excitement ramps up. It’s Christmas Adam for our family. Everyone gets a small gift. We all eat dessert.

It’s nothing fancy. Mainly silly. But another fun way to celebrate the season.

We’ve actually cut out some traditions this year. The one Advent book got re-packed. The other Advent calendar got forgotten. We returned a Christmas book to the library that I knew we’d never finish.

Yes, we still use our favorite Advent calendar. Each day we get a verse to read, story from the The Jesus Storybook Bible, a fun activity, and a giving activity.

The big boys and I are also reading The Vanderbeekers of 141st Street. And we love it!

We’ve stuck with the “Something you want, Something you need, Something to wear, Something to read” gift pattern for the kids. The predictability of this has been glorious for all of us.

There’s a real tree up in the living room. Stockings over the fireplace. Constant Craigslist searches for a new puppy (shh…don’t tell the kids). A wreath on the front door. Flashing “headache” lights in the boys’ room. Crafty snowmen. Glitter everywhere. Cookie tins in the pantry. Overall excitement filling this house!

But there’s still quiet (kinda). When we sit around the table. Or gather in the living room. And read about Him. The One who came. The One who died. The One who gives us reason to celebrate. To have traditions like Christmas Adam.

That’s what Christmas is like for us. It’s loud. And expensive. And bright.

But it’s also beautiful.

Because last Christmas was grace. This Christmas will be grace. And that first Christmas…it was definitely grace.

Merry Christmas (and Christmas Adam…and Christmas Eve) from our family to yours!!!

 

 

 

How I thrive (survive/stay alive) with 5!

“I don’t know how you do it.”

I hear that sentence about once a week. From friends. Family. Even strangers.

And I know what they mean. What they’re really saying.

“I don’t know how you put up with so many kids for so many hours a day.”

Why would a sane person have 5 of them? Why would they choose to stay home with them? And how in the world do they do it?

Okay. Here’s the answer. For any of you considering 5 kids. Considering homeschooling. Considering jumping out of a plane with a mended parachute.

One-God. Honestly. I couldn’t do it without my morning time in the closet (literally) with Him. Tucked away from the world. Cramming verses into my head. Scribbling prayers that often end with “help me.”

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Two-Quiet time. “Do not come out of your rooms till 3:00.” This house shuts down from 2:00-3:00 every day. Not kidding. The introvert in me craves this hour of silence. It’s golden. Do not speak to me. Do not cry. Do not come near my bedroom door.

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Three-Video games. Judge me. It’s fine. But our kids get an hour of “screen time” every day after quiet time. They come up, get a snack, then waste their brains for an hour. So in total, I get (count it) 2 hours of “me time” every afternoon. And it’s glorious!

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Four-Schedule. Things run like clockwork around here. I’m a legalist when it comes to routine. A little OCD maybe. The big boys know what to do when. They know when  it’s their “school with Mom time,” “watch Esther/Kenan time,” and “alone time.”

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Five-Trampoline. “Everybody outside right now.” I say it almost every day. “Go. Just go. Everybody on the trampoline.” Because we all (me included) need fresh air. We need to jump. Throw balls at each other. Curl up in blankets and read books.

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That’s just 5. I could name tons more. Helpful friends. Jeremy’s support. Family close by. Simple curriculum. Crockpots. Audio books. Minimal expectations. Ritz crackers.

Is this the life my 18 year old self envisioned?

Not a chance. Not a single piece of my current reality matches up with my original plans.

And that could scare me to death. Make me doubt.

Or it could make me humble. Reliant. Leaning hard into the only One who really knows.

God doesn’t make mistakes. With our jobs, families, locations, or callings. With our kid-count. Money-count. Achievement-count.

He just keeps loving us. And strengthening us. And being extra gracious to us.

And in the irony of it all, I find myself echoing these same words back to Him.

“I don’t know how You do it.”

“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake (Psalm 23:1-3)