I held him on the top bunk. The warmth of his fever made my whole body warm. And we listened to them playing on the floor above us. Huge thuds. Running feet. It seemed like the ceiling may collapse.
And as he fell asleep, I thought…
Those noises sound scary. Like thunder. Like mayhem. But they’re not. They’re grace.
The sounds are the feet of 4 healthy children. The sounds of their Daddy chasing them.
Grace can be mistaken as noise.
Grace can be mistaken through fear.
When I hold too tightly I miss grace. I miss love when fear wins.
Jesus’ death was grace perfected. It was in the laying down. Why do I work so hard to hold on?
Most days I’m trying to maintain control. Manage. Keep people calm. Ordered.
Am I holding so tightly that grace is silenced? What have I missed?
So thankful for today…another chance to kiss and hold and love and really see these gifts God has given. Another chance to realize how much He loves me.
“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” (James 1:17)