A Letter on Her 4th Birthday…

To Esther’s Matka,

In another place, Matka would mean Mom. You are her Mom. Some define Mom as “the one who puts her kids before herself.” 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, I would be cradling love in my arms with total fear in my heart. Praying you’d stay firm in your decision. 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, she would run to you when she felt pain. But love sometimes means taking the pain on yourself. 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, we’d still be anxiously begging our phone to ring with a referral. Hoping a brave birthmom would choose us. 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, you’d give up sleep and time to be with her. You’d long so deeply for her happiness that you’d make big sacrifices. 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, our boys would grow up without a sister. They’d miss the strength a woman can show in the middle of raw emotion. 4 years ago today…you did that.

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In another place, you’d be taking her to her 4th birthday party. You’d be wrapping her present. Making her cake. Singing her happy birthday. You’d be snuggling her all day and kissing those brown cheeks…because she is grace to you.

4 years ago today…you were grace to us. You handed us your treasure. You gave us a piece of yourself.

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And I can’t forget the strength I saw in your face. I can’t forget the way those tears of brokenness fell. And I won’t ever forget the words you said to us over and over again.

“I’m doing this because I love her. Tell her that.”

And I do tell her. Over and over and over again.

And I tell her God loves her that way too. He loves her enough to sacrifice. He loves her enough to lay everything down for her. To give it all up.

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Thank you, M… We love you more than you could possibly know.

Love,
Tiffany

“But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.” (Galatians 4:4,5)

 

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2 thoughts on “A Letter on Her 4th Birthday…

  1. The most unselfish thing you can do. Birth mothers are heroes because they have put their child first. May God richly bless you for your decision. I know He has your baby.

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