Choosing the Pouring Out

“I almost wish I’d break something so I could get a break.”

That’s what I said the other day. It was selfish. It was spontaneous. But it was true.

Breaks are sometimes hard to come by.

Later I found myself in Matthew 26.

“Now when Jesus was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, a woman came up to him with an alabaster flask of very expensive ointment, and she poured it on his head as he reclined at table.” 

How can I keep pouring when I feel empty?

“And when the disciples saw it, they were indignant, saying, ‘Why this waste? For this could have been sold for a large sum and given to the poor’.” 

How can I keep pouring when it seems like a waste?

“But Jesus, aware of this, said to them, ‘Why do you trouble the woman? For she has done a beautiful thing to me. For you always have the poor with you, but you will not always have me. In pouring this ointment on my body, she has done it to prepare me for burial.”

How can I NOT keep pouring when Jesus calls it beautiful?

Every day I have the chance to say I “get to” (grace) instead of I “have to” (law).

Every day I have the chance to offer something beautiful to my Savior.

Because of grace and a Savior’s eyes that see beauty when I see broken, we offer all of ourselves…poured out…over and over again.

“Truly, I say to you, wherever this gospel is proclaimed in the whole world, what she has done will also be told in memory of her.”

And HE says…not an ounce of it is in vain.


Sometimes it really does seem worth it!






DR Day 5!

This morning we worshipped at the local church. Thank God for the English interpreter!

In the afternoon we visited a home that has become a safe place for hurting Dominican girls. We took the girls to a local park and enjoyed icecream.


As their “acting father” shared the story of their ministry I felt a mix of sadness, awe, and guilt. Even now I can’t put these feelings completely into words.

We claim to live with hands held open but next to this…they seem clinched tight.

Tonight we went back to the church where a lady from our campus (Ina) shared her testimony.

The boys have found ways to entertain each other there during downtime without their Kindles. I believe this has been good for their often rocky sibling relationship.


We head back home tomorrow. I’m doubtful there will be time to blog. Please pray for safety.

Also, I have no idea what amount I still owe for this trip. Oh goodness! Hoping for a miracle of sorts.

I’ll keep you posted. Thanks y’all! God has been faithful!

“Then shall your light break forth like the dawn, and your healing shall spring up speedily; your righteousness shall go before you; the glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard.” (Isaiah 58:8)

We made it to the DR!

We’re here! Got up at 3:00 weary by now but here. And safe!

Our flights were great. The boys loved the mini-TV’s on the first flight. I sat beside a Will Smith look a like in the airport. We ate a cold cinnamon bun at 5:00…delicious!

We got to tour the amazing work that God is doing here in the Dominican…baseball ministry, church, school, etc. It’s clear His hand is here, and He is leading Gary and Allison and their team.

Humbled. That’s how I feel.

My eyes are heavy, but my heart so full. Full of joy at seeing how God is working. Full of a little conviction at how dog gone selfish I am.

Ann Voskamp’s new book, “The Broken Way” is my trip read. Couldn’t be more ordained. It’s okay to be broken. Broken to be poured out. Filled with Him.

God, help me to live like that. Hands always open. Help Stephen and Caleb to see this. To see how You came to love. How you’ve called us to love. Could there be anything greater than being emptied for Him?

“Is not this the fast that I choose: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the straps of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and to break every yoke?” (Isaiah 58:6)



Broken Fall Masterpieces

October 31, 2013


I glanced out the window and saw the leaves. All beautiful in their red and orange. Their simple beauty made me stop. Look. Then I felt You nudge me. “Look. That is what I’m doing in You.”

I want to run from the window now. The beauty doesn’t seem worth the pain. Dying to live. Saying no to say yes. Transformation so small I don’t see it til one glorious morning.

Yes, Lord, You are breaking me; making me new really. Maybe I don’t like it, but I can’t look at the fall trees without catching my breath. You are a God of masterpieces.

I love You!




“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:11)